I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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