K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
