no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
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