Buhtt sex?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize