I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
