you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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