booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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