the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
