You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize