dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize