she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
tequila makes me forget i have legs
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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