is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
