Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
