whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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