im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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