its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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