and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Just took my morning after pill in the library
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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