the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
