turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
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