There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
