now i know why i became what i already was.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize