i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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