When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
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