you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Randomize