I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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