New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased