ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
