The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
