when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
