It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
