I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
