just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
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It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
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