# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
well you can't waste a boner
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
