Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
