the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
