I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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