so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Randomize
