I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
