Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
That was before I lit my hair on fire
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize