My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
