so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
