Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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