i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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