Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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