what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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