i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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