It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
