Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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