He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
