he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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