So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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